Flexing my Discomfort Muscles

My mom picked out bright turquoise for her toenails and while the pedicurist was working away at our feet, she reminisced about the time she took me to the airport the day I was leaving to live in Korea. She said I was standing there at the customs gate, a.k.a the point of no return, crying that I was scared and I didn't want to go.

This time our goodbyes have worked out better; she's leaving for a meditation retreat in Puerto Vallarta 3 days before I head off to Brazil and I'll have only the taxi driver to say goodbye to at the airport. Much better.

Maybe it's because I've been off sugar for a month now, and have had practice with that itchy me-needs-that-cookie feeling, but I've noticed that I'm much more comfortable with discomfort. I was hit by a giant teary wave of sadness as I realized I wouldn't see my mom for a long while, and I just let it be. My first thought was, this big sadness is love. And I felt okay with it.

In his post Discomfort Zone: How to Master the Universe Leo gives lots of ideas on how to master discomfort and ways to start. I especially like using meditation. Just the idea of sitting still for a few minutes makes most people uncomfortable never mind a left toe falling asleep, a right ear itching, a butt cramp, and a back ache that quickly crop up as quietness settles in. But noticing and overcoming these little aches and pains is an easy way to become used to discomfort.

Moving to Brazil will be an adventure sure to be exciting, and at times it will be too hot, too crowded, too disorganized, too loud, too salty, too weird, too slow, too polluted, too scary, too late, too different, but to follow this quote that landed in my email today: "Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at this moment." (Oneness With All Life), I'll take it all, even the annoying discomforts.

Packing Kids Toys

Ah! I love Value Village, don't you? Last summer, when I got my sewing machine, I went there and found a huge bag of different colored zippers mostly about a hand's length. So you ask, what are you going to do with these zippers, make mini parkas for the kids' stuffed animals? Cute idea, but no.  I've made a ton of pouches for all the multi-piece toys we plan to bring to Brazil with us.  They pack way better than boxes and the kid already knows which game is inside by the color of the zipper. I've also made some for myself to contain my art supplies, jewelry, intimates, etc...Definitely my newest favorite thing.

In Search of Fish Tacos in Rio de Janeiro

So I've been challenged these days. Can you guess what's been the most challenging?

The 3 week cough that went away for a day and then returned as a head cold?
The yummy gingerbread people in my cupboard, singing carols on a continuous loop, testing my patience, knowing that the only way to shut them up is to eat them?
The crusty road rash spread across my son's face after a nasty face plant off his bike?
Telling my mother that her Friday dates with her grandson will be on hold until we come back from our 2 year relocation to Brazil?
Is it the paper chase and important document round-up?
Is it listening to a prospective renter tell me that she's been living in a former grow-op full of mold, mice and electrical issues while her other place is being re-mediated for leaks, and on and on and oh, by the way, do I think that it would be okay to keep a 5 foot freezer full or frozen middle-eastern food on the back patio?
Is it the ever growing list of things to do before we leave? Nope, none of those things.

Staying in the moment is the real challenge. That and doing less. For a few days, I carried around a mental list of "things we need to bring", mostly spurred on by expats in Rio listing off everything they miss from home, and I suddenly I had this belief that I need certain things to be comfortable while I'm away; like my natural toothpaste, and certain type of sandals for my kid, and a blow up pool to set on the bottom of the showers 'cause they don't have tubs, and a life jacket for swimming in the pool at grandpa's and a replacement-less-fancy-so-I-don't-get-mugged wedding ring to wear while I'm down there, and hard-to-find spices and.... Are you reading this insanity?

Those things don't matter. Yes, there will be things down there that cost more, some things will be hard to find or impossible to find and I will miss organic dark chocolate, fish tacos and English books, but that's all part of the adventure, isn't it? Because if it's all like home, then why go at all, right?

In the end, there will be a suitcase sitting at the foot of my bed. There will be only a limited amount of space. Us three, will be on that plane, together, but our suitcases might be bound for Taiwan by mistake...

In the end, someone else might be living in our house,
they might decide to store a skidoo or a stuffed moose on the back patio.
Or maybe our house will stay vacant, quietly waiting for us to come home.

In the end, we'll say goodbye to loved ones and we will cry.
And later, especially when the kid does something cool
or when we're celebrating something special,
we'll wish we could be with them for real.

So, to meet this challenge, here's what I've done in this moment; I've put a ready-made frozen lasagna in the oven, I've sat myself down on the couch while my kid watches cartoons, and I'm looking at photos of our past trips to Brazil, remembering all that is wonderful about it. Mission accomplished!

In Vancouver, maybe a seal would swim up to your boat, but in Brazil it's a manatee!

Now, that's what I call a vacation!

My father-in-law makes my favorite Brazilian dish; prawn and cassava stew!

Farmer's Market

This is the beach in Barra the Tijuca, where I'll be living. No seaweed here!

Can't wait to take the kid up to see the Corcovado on the train!

Captain's Log, March 19th, 1996- 1st Entry

Don't ask me what got into me, but I started to make a quilt for my Kid. What was I thinking? I've decided that quilters are insane; you have to be to cut up big pieces of fabric into little itty-bitty pieces, sew all the itty-bitty pieces back together again to make a big piece, and then sew all over top of it to keep all the layers together. WHAT? Crazy, I say! I'm already feeling slightly dizzy and I'm not even making those super complicated ones. Holy smokes. I don't know, it's nice to be doing this for my son, but I feel about it, the way I feel about scrapbooking. It's a pre-made recipe.  All you have to do is glue.

too many squares.....

Anyways, this got me thinking about a quilt exhibition I saw in Port Townsend on March 11, 1996. Why do I remember this date when I can hardly remember how old I am? It's because it was on the first day of a long road trip I was taking with my then-boyfriend. We had both graduated university and decided to buy a 1973 mustard-yellow Dodge camper van which we nicknamed Good Ship Miss Debbie. We also decided to keep a travel log, this being the pre-digital age, and being on a tight budget, we didn't take too many pictures and instead we decided I would draw and he would write.


Port Townsend, Washington was our first stop and I made a special note about the "Quilting through History" museum in our log. I remember some of the quilts were over 100 years old and very well preserved. They didn't look at all like what we think of and see today. They were all hand-made, embroidered and depicted scenes of everyday life at that time. Some clearly told specific stories about the people who were making it or sleeping in it. It was fascinating that quilting was recording history just like story-telling.

Here are the first 2 entries in the log, my then-boyfriend, wrote pretty well, I think, but obviously wasn't so taken by the quilts as I was.

March 11, 9pm-1st entry
 
Left the Port of Townsend today, bound for Southern waters on the Good Ship Miss Debbie. New First Mate and Navigator on this voyage by the name of Solare Cayer, commendable sense of direction and excellent map-reading skills. Surprising given that this is her maiden voyage in such a capacity. Presently we are moored on the blacktop of the ferry terminal a few miles out of Coupeville on our way to Port Townsend. Early indications were bad, given the dead pigeon and mortally wounded young doe we have seen thus far. We must try to keep our mojo working for us and continue with the roadkill count. Minor customs delay due to rent-a-cop type with nothing better to do, but at least we weren't searched bodily as were the four young black gentlemen next to us in the office. Those people take their jobs way to seriously. Ferry ready for boarding, thus ends the first entry.

March 12

Navigator went to sleep after Aberdeen-a logging town of unrequited uglyness and menace. This goes a long way toward explaining the tragedy of Kurt Cobain. Port Townsend on the other hand was a picture postcard-more akin to America's Hollywood version of itself than to the grim readily revealed by the past few logging towns. Not that they are without their quirky charm, but Port Townsend's veneer of old world charm was nearly completely blinding. However the America within was revealed in the washroom of the restaurant where we had morning coffee. I found a label for 30 lbs or X-heavy mayonnaise. The true beauty beneath the false front. A classic theme in art and lit brought to life in Washington's Victorian Seaport.

Travel Sickness and Packing Light

There is a reoccurring pattern in our family; colds and sickness like to come around just before or during vacations. Why is that? Because we're working too hard just before to make up missed work time? We're running around trying to get everything packed and cleaned before the departure? We develop an allergy to relaxing? So here is my plan to alleviate the "stress" of travel.

I'm making a big pot of cold green tea, in honor of light travel. I am toasting myself for being extra conscious as we are about to go away, to pack light and to remember that leaving the comforts of home is part of the adventure! Here's what I'm keeping in mind as we get ready to go.

I will take naps.
I will smile a lot and have fun.
I will make an effort to meet great people, because they know the great places.
I will eat slowly and savor flavors.
I will be present and won't think ahead about what we're going to do.
I will read a lot.

Happy Trails!

Circle Farm Tours

If you're getting the feeling like you want to bust out of town and you want to avoid the line-up at the border, head out on a Circle Farm Tour. These 5 self guided tours take you across beautiful farm lands in Maple Ridge & Pitt Meadows, Langley, Abbotsford, Chilliwack, and Agassiz as you stop and sample all the wonderful local goods and produce this rich valley has to offer.

Here is a tiny list of what you will want to bring home for a most fantabulous outdoor meal: a bottle of wine from Le Domaine De Chaberton, cheese curds from Golden Ears CheeseCrafters, cranberry vinegar from The Fort Langley Wine Company, piles of strawberries and blueberries from Driediger Farms, and an antique table from Granny and Grumpa's to serve it on. Don't forget the organic Angus beef and a hand thrown salad bowl from Greendale Pottery, some blooms from Minter Gardens and freshly roasted coffee from The Back Porch. There are dozens of interesting places to stop, but my favorite tour is the Agassiz &Harrison Mills tour, the scenery and the proximity to Harrison Lake make the extra time on the highway worth it.

Visit www.circlefarmtour.com or pick up the summer issue of Edible Vancouver magazine at your local grocery store to find all the tour maps. Now is the time, the strawberries are here!

Family Month of May

I haven't posted at all this month, mainly because it's been a month of family visits. Some came to stay and I traveled back east to see some others. Mostly family I rarely see because of the distances and the price of air tickets. I do have to say though that a trip to Quebec, even with sitting in a traffic jam on a dilapidated overpass  in downtown Montreal is a breeze compared to the 24 hr, delirium inducing trip to Rio de Janeiro. Canada is just so darn big, and Brazil so darn far. I envy the folks in Europe who with such civility ride a cozy train across a picturesque country side while reading the paper and sipping on a spritzer, while us Canadians have to shlep our carefully weighted carry-on and sit behind a screaming child while picking apart a soggy, overpriced sandwich.

Canadian Airlines should offer a "buy 3 get one free" promotion for family members sharing the same last name and traveling domestically. That way we can all reunite more often and discover our own country. I've never been to PEI, the Yukon, Nunavut or the Northwest Territories. Most of the others were a drive though. One of my uncles has a family pool going for a lottery, and if we win, the money would be used to have a giant family reunion. I miss them, my family. I feel sad that I'm a long-distance aunt and sister-in-law.

My East Coast Brother, Julien