Yesterday morning I was thinking about the first chapter I read on Buddhist philosophy in a book my mother gave me for Valentine's Day. At the end of each chapter, the author gives you an exercise to practice new learnings: "Practice noticing nobility in others by remembering them as they might have been as a child." I remember thinking about this when I was working as a career counselor, noticing that my unemployed clients' uncertainty and fears made them react in what might be considered "annoying, rude and even sometimes, crazy" by others. It wasn't uncommon for clients to yell at others, blame themselves and everyone around them, cry, swear, and if I can say; throwing a huge tantrum. I remember sitting with these vulnerable clients and seeing how childlike they seemed; in need of care, reassurance, love, encouragement, and patience. I was noticing their nobility.
This exercise was on my mind when I took off for my run with Baby and a big bag of library books. It was an unusually warm and sunny day and it people were out enjoying it. I noticed ahead of me an old man walking with a cane and I thought about the exercise; imagining him as a kid, running quickly, climbing and jumping. Just as I passed him, I turned to him and said hello. He smiled back and one moment later he fell back, his cane falling and his toque flying off. I think we were both surprised. I helped him to get up, putting my arms under his and holding him up as I bent down to pick up his cane. He kept smiling as I asked him if he was okay. I picked up his toque, wiped the leaves off his back and gave it back to him. I noticed that there was no way he would be able to put it back on with only one hand. I took it back from him and put it on for him, tucking his ears under to keep him warm. At that moment, I looked in his smiling face and he seemed like a child, laughing about falling, and feeling better after someone picked him up.
It occurred to me that when we do something with care and love we are honoring the nobility of people's heart. We are letting them know that they matter and they are loved, just as all babies are born to be loved and cared for. My Baby is loved unconditionally by many people. It seems that as we get older we are less able to remember our innocence and how perfectly wonderful we are. As adults, we are supposed to have it figured out and when we admit that we don't, it seems we're not as cute and as lovable anymore. The client who walked into our office screaming in anger that employers are losers, and what the hell were we going to go to help her, might have been pushed aside for being rude and abusive and sent away. But what if we imagine that same client being only 6 months old, wouldn't we all want to take her in our arms and comfort her? Tell her that everything would be okay?
A funny thing happened yesterday, an old man with a cane reminded me to practice finding nobility in others.
Brilliant!
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